Monday, April 25, 2011

Aww, what a sweet little Dick!

Last week I went to see The Adjustment Bureau, and it was actually pretty entertaining for a Matt Damon movie. Being a huge Philip K. Dick fan, I wasn't really sure how I was going to feel about a romantic little sci-fi movie that's based on one of his short stories, but I ended up liking it quite a bit. See, you've got these strange beings, and they look like '60s dudes, with suits and hats and everything, but really they're some sort of angels or something, whose job is to make sure that everything goes according to plan in the world. Specifically, they have to make sure that Matt Damon and Emily Blunt don't hook up, because apparently, even though they're obviously meant to be together, every time he sticks it to her an angel loses its wings or something. Now, I never really got what the big deal was about Emily Blunt, but her performance in The Adjustment Bureau is just spectacular, and I can now honestly say that if I had to fight the People Upstairs for the right to get into her little British panties, I'd definitely give it a shot. I may not be able to understand what a classy broad like that would see in the poorly animated mannequin that is Matt Damon, but I totally understand why his character would fall madly in love with her after that brief men's room encounter, which tragically isn't nearly as sleazy as it sounds. It could be my medication, or it could simply be Ms. Blunt's rocking body, but surprisingly enough, all that romance didn't make me want to puke even once. I didn't even mind the dancing parts, which just goes to show you that the only way dancing has any value is when a hot chick is the one doing it. What did bother me a little was that for some reason they changed the character of the talking dog from The Adjustment Team, the short story that the movie was based on, into a black dude. Not cool, and pretty damn racist, even if it was a black dog in the story. Man, talking dogs are hilarious. Talking animals are pretty cool in general, except when they're in an American CG animated movie. I saw this fish a couple of weeks ago, and it was totally talking to me. He was all like, holy crap, I'm in a fridge at the supermarket! Why the hell am I in a fridge? This sucks! It kinda creeped me out, so I just walked away. Anyway, my point is, while the short story had much better special effects, The Adjustment Bureau is a pretty interesting and very cute expansion of it. It's no Minority Report, but it's miles and miles above that Ben Affleck/Uma Thurman piece of crap.

Emily's Blunts. Aren't they lovely?

In other news: I've been watching Sliders lately, after not having watched a single episode for over a decade, but now that I'm halfway through the third season and Kari Wührer is a regular, it's getting harder and harder to watch an entire episode from start to finish without pausing to do the happy peepee dance.

Marvel at Kari Wührer, the sexploitation queen of the '90s

They really don't make them this hot anymore. Seriously, if this keeps up I'm going to whittle my pee stick down to a bloody stump. I guess I just need to keep reminding myself that in reality she's almost 44. Still hot though, I'm guessing. Damn. My pee stick is doomed.

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