Thursday, January 28, 2010

Do you fancy my dinosaur?

Last night I've finally finished watching all three seasons of Primeval, a British creature feature type of TV show created by the guys who made all those Walking With docus, and I really really liked all of it. See, one day these crazy anomalies that look like big shiny chandeliers start appearing all around the city of London. An anomaly is a space-time portal that seems to open up at random, then stays open long enough to allow some scaly creature from another time to pass through and scare a bunch of hapless British bystanders and finally closes down just as abruptly. Naturally you need a team of specialists to deal with the whole phenomenon, and that's exactly what we get here. The self-appointed head expert on anomalies is Nick Cutter, a professor of Paleontology whose bitch of a wife has disappeared eight years ago. Apparently she's been traveling through anomalies all this time, getting only bitchier and bitchier every day, until finally she's decided to return to the present for a while and become the show's main villain. Professor Cutter has a rather dashing young assistant who also used to bang Mrs. Cutter back when she wasn't walking with dinosaurs, which is totally gross. Joining them is some tech geek who's totally into dinosaurs and has even geekier friends, and an insanely adorable zoo chick whose speciality is taking care of reptiles, played by the lovely Hannah Spearritt of S Club 7, um, fame. Rounding up the cast is the uptight government douche who's in charge of the whole operation, played rather aptly by some sort of unfunny comedian, and the cute government chick who works for him, played by the deliciously voluptuous Lucy Brown. The thing is, with no offence to the human characters in Primeval, its real stars are the prehistoric and future creatures that pop up here and there and wreak wonderful havoc wherever they go. Now, I've always adored dinosaurs, but I kinda hate documentaries, so I was always ambivalent about Walking with Dinosaurs and all those other type of 'let's produce semi-realistic dinosaur animation and not do anything interesting with the result' shows. This, however, and pure dino fun! You get all sorts of dinosaurs, both big and small, meat eaters and herbivores, realistic or slightly modified to fit the needs of the story, and they are all beautifully animated, interacting seamlessly with their very British surroundings and generally looking extremely cool. You get pterasuars roaming the skies and ichtyyosaurs (my favorites!) munching on swimmers in public pools. You get mammoths stomping cars, giant ancient rhinos throwing four wheelers up in the air and people who adopt sabertooth tigers as pets. You even get a bunch of adorable dodos who go around bumping into things and getting kidnapped! And as if that's not enough, you also get creatures from the future, like giant insects and creepy looking seals and camouflage gremlins and these vicious carnivorous beasts that were somehow evolved from bats! And, there's also plenty of human eye candy as well. Hannah Spearritt seems to only get younger and cuter and prettier with each and every episode, and it sure doesn't hurt that she keeps prancing around her apartment in her undies, supposedly because her pet prehistoric flying reptile likes it warm. I love it how being attracted to her makes me feel like a total pedo, even though she's only about a year younger than me. Also, I'm way too old to be able to say that the S Club 7 TV shows used to be my porn, but I still like to say it anyway. My only concern with Ms. Spearritt is that her shoulders look extremely freckled, which is, you know, pretty adorable, but I also really hope that she knows how to take care of her skin because cancer is definitely not sexy (not even the boob kind). It took me a while to realize just how hot Lucy Brown really is, but as soon as she got out of that business suit she's been wearing for most of the first season it became pretty obvious, and even more so after a time shift between the first and second seasons had changed her character pretty drastically, among other things. I really hated to see her character leave the show in the middle of the third season, along with Professor Cutter, but I guess the new characters aren't too bad. Primeval was cancelled after only three seasons, but it was later resurrected and two new seasons are supposed to be aired in 2011, and this time in HD, so in about a year we'll finally be able see just how good the CGI really is. Now if only I could get Primeval in 3D HD, then I could truly be happy.

Hannah Spearritt wants your lizard!

I also watched Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine yesterday, a spy spoof from 1965 in which the awesome Vincent Price plays a mad scientist who creates an army of scorching hot bikini fembots who go out and marry rich men for their money. It's a pretty hilarious film, full of gorgeous '60s babes and delightful '60s dialogs ("What's a rotten girl like you doing in a nice place like this?") and fun '60s music and I really liked it. I guess now I just have to look the sequel up.

Lucy Brown looks pretty nice when she's not dressed like a dude

And earlier this week I watched The Time Traveler's Wife, and it was pretty much what I had expected. I've actually read the book a couple of years ago (it was on sale), but I didn't go see the movie when it first came out because I just didn't feel too comfortable paying to see something this girly. Or, as a wise person had once put it, because I'm a total pussy.

1 comment:

  1. Don't kmow what it is about Lucy Brown, but she is one of the most beautiful women in her own way.