Wednesday, September 23, 2009

The most hilarious family in America

Last night I watched The Most Hated Family in America, a documentary by Louis Theroux from 2007. I really like Louis Theroux. He's cool and dorky and Jewish-looking and doesn't mind getting himself into extremely awkward situations. This particular piece was about the Westboro Baptist Church, possibly the craziest church in existence today. Founded in 1955, the church has about 70 members, most of them belong to one family, who are led by the family's archpatriarch, an old geezer known as "Gramps". As you may or may not have guessed by now, the WBC is all about hate. God hates you. God hates homosexuals. Anyone engaged in any sort of sexual activity that isn't a married man and woman in a bed is a homosexual, so that probably means you too. God hates America. God hates Sweden. God hates Italy. God hates Catholics. God hates Muslims. God hates Jews. Anyone who gets killed has died because he was a sinner. It is also common knowledge that homosexuals eat poop. That one cracked me up! When interviewed by Theroux, Gramps pretty much admits that anyone who doesn't belong to his church is going to burn in hell. The church is really big on picketing with all kinds of weird signs. Did you know that Barack Obama is the Antichrist? I knew there was something funny about him. They also like to picket next to funerals of war casualties, because American soldiers are homosexuals. Cults are funny. It makes you realize how far you can go by brainwashing children into becoming utterly insane as adults. One of the girls, a 21 year old law student who is also one of Gramps' granddaughters, looks especially disturbed. She's always smiling and running around and she always acts real nice, talking about how happily she dedicates her life to God and how she's not planning on ever getting married (because the end is nigh or something), but you can tell just by looking at her that she's desperately starving for some man meat. That part was sort of sad. You could see a couple of WBC members in Sacha Baron Cohen's Brüno, and now that I know more about the church it makes that scene even more hilarious. In my opinion, the mystery behind the church is pretty simple. Gramps is completely out of his mind, that much is obvious, but anyone can see that he would love to get it up the bum himself. Self hating homosexuals make the best homophobes.

But we're so cute and cuddly!

The thing I don't get about the whole "ideology" behind the church is something I don't understand about all the monotheistic religions. If God himself has created the world, why would he create things in it that he doesn't like? If sins are so bad, why would he create the concept of sin? Why would he create Satan, for that matter? I've always found it really weird that people talk about a war between heaven and hell. Wouldn't that be like a man battling with his own paper-mâché creations? How can you seriously fight or hate anything you've created yourself, especially if you're God and think you're all good and almighty and stuff? I could direct that question to some religious people I know, but I don't really want to. Religious people tend to give you boring answers that don't make much sense unless you believe in the same stuff they do.

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